Thursday, December 23, 2010

'Tis The Season



Nothing makes one feel more festive than a christmas tree....




...except perhaps for christmas bird.


Merry Christmas! xx

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Feeling Tired and Frustrated

Well as we all know, the festive season is here, and I am, as always, broke. I have bills coming out of my bum, and a christmas lunch to organise and execute, a trip to my parents to organise, pay for and execute, Uni to organise, and NOW, a MIL who says that she wants me to finish my driving log book before the end of the holidays, despite the fact that I cant actual take my provisional test until July.

Well I am putting my foot down. I REFUSE to drive aimlessly for 2 hours a day for the next 6 weeks for no good reason, when I have so much else I have to do. I am tired and beginning to have my patience with people very stretched. As it is, I have had to delay organising my new years trip to my mother's because I don't have the money to book tickets yet. I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE.

I want to do my driving hours when I want to do them, not when she wants me to do them. It isn't that I don't appreciate her help, but I think that I should be able to decide when and where and how and with whom I do my hours.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Uni

I hate how much my texts are going to cost.

I hate having to pick the units......

I hate the tension of not knowing what my ATAR will be.

I hate that I have to wait to apply.

I hate feeling stupid about wanting someone to help me enrol.

I am excited though...

Friday, November 26, 2010

WARNING! SNAKE EATING A PINKIE MOUSE

Some pictures I took of Mr Cuddles eating a mouse.




The pinkies are killed humanely. Mr cuddles is only fed on dead prey - no live feeding for him. He is also handled regularly, so he is pretty docile. :)

A special gift


Ryan made it for me :)

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Harry Harlow

I have been reading about the work of the psychologist Harry Harlow. I must admit I cried a lot while I was reading about his work, and I can't believe he could have done such things...but something inside me wants to thank him for the advances he made in understanding the importance of affection and contact between mothers and babies... the sacrifice of his victims...the monkeys he deprived of all love....have shown us exactly what not to do. I feel so conflicted, because I cannot deny, as so many others would like to...that he has helped us as a society, to ignore the voices of the past, which would seek to encourage us to deprive our children, and to embrace that natural and necessary urge to hold them close to us, and to let them grow, and leave us when they are ready...

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Some Regrets.

Today is one of those days...

I try not to think about it too much as a rule, but it is just getting to me today. There is something really conflicting in the knowledge that you will never have another child, when you already have one. For a few years I have felt the desire to have another baby...but I can't. I can't help but feel so defeated and unhappy about it...which makes me feel guilty, because I have Jordis. She is a beautiful girl and I love her. I can't help it though...Something in me wants another baby...

Is it wrong of me to feel sad about not having any more?

Friday, November 19, 2010

Blueberry Pancakes

This morning's breakfast menu includes, Blueberry Pancakes.



Ingredients:

1 punnet of blue berries
2 cups of self raising flour
2 cups of lite milk
1 egg
1/2 cup of raw castor sugar (or honey if preferred - or for a less sweet variety, add only a table spoon of sugar/honey)
pinch of salt
1/2 vanilla bean, scraped, discard pod. (or 1 tsp of vanilla extract)
60 gms melted butter


I am lazy, so I put all the dry ingredients into my food processor, add the melted butter and pulse for 30 seconds, add the egg and pulse for 30 seconds, then I mix the vanilla with the milk and slowly pour it in through the top, with the processor on medium, and then process until smooth (about 2 minutes).

But for those who don't have a processor, crush up the blue berries with a fork, then add the sugar and egg and beat with a whisk for about 5 minutes. then add the butter and mix for a minute. Then mix the vanilla with the milk and add the milk and flour alternately in small amounts, mixing thoroughly after each addition, to avoild lumps, beginning and ending with milk. I normally let the batter proof for one hour, covered on the bench, but this isn't essential - it just helps with cooking - if you cook them straight away, they can sometimes fall appart or be hardto flip.

To cook, I use canola spray, but you could use butter or margarine as well. Spray the entire inside surface of a small fry-pan, and place on a low heat. Add the desired amount of batter to the pan, and wait until they start to brown around the edges and bubbles form on the surface (this will take about 3-5 minutes). Then, using a clean, metal egg-flip, flip the pancake over onto the other side to cook, for about 1-2 minutes. using the handle of the fry, pan, shake the pancake loose, and turn it onto a plate, or you can lift it off with the flip.

Do this with all of the batter. The quantity will depend on how big you make your pancakes. I get about 8-10 from this mix, but mine are HUGE.

I like to eat mine with more blue berries, sliced banana and strawberries or with drizzled honey and lemon juice.




Tuesday, November 16, 2010

a bit meh

It has been a while since I posted anything significant, and so, I thought I would do it now.

Stuff is all over the place.

My craft room is a mess, My sister and Husband keep hating each other with venom, we have ALL been sick last week, a good friend is angry with me, for reasons that I am having trouble accepting as fair, I haven't had time to knit much or even to spin since finishing school and I am generally on edge and uncomfortable.

On a positive note, I did finish the HSC, so all I have to do now is wait for my results, but the current listlessness makes me feel like I should be doing something more substantial with my time than sewing toys and playing Baldur's Gate. This year has been a constant stream of "I have to do it now's" and no that I don't have much I have to do, and more an endless trickle of things I should do, I am in danger of falling into the pit of "I should do it but I couldn't be bothered right now". I have been there before, and it is a dangerous place to be. I feel my house falling to bits around me already, and I need to pull my finger out and pick up the house keeping reigns again, before it becomes deep mess.

I don't even have the energy to organise Jordis' Party properly. I aimed to have the invites out by the end of this week, and I may still but knowing me, I wont. I am going to try though.

My mind has caved in on itself, after 2 years of non-stop stress. I thought I would feel better than I do to have it all done...

In other news,my friend Rae has opened up an Etsy store. I think it is called "The Wool Division" but she has just opened up, so I am not sure. It is here though :) I am very happy for her, and I know that she will do well. She has much experience with running an online store, so she is sure to get good business.

I have been sewing a lot lately - both quilting and toys. I like it.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Raising your child.

I want to make this clear. I am a firm and unwavering supporter of non-violent, informed and attachment parenting methods. I am not open to argument on this point.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Merry Early Christmas to me!


I have the best man-thing ever! Meet my new best friend, Jacqueline. She is my new kitchen hand.

Friday, October 22, 2010

wooly goodness.








HSC is OVER...well almost

I can't help but feeling, even though I still have one more exam left, that the HSC is over and I am finished High school forever, I feel weird. I feel numb.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Take two.


Done on better paper.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The transformed thoughts of my inner critic.

my journal started to fall apart. I am going to make a new one out of water colour paper and do it again.



willowing.ning.com

Friday, October 15, 2010

Getting the veggie patch going

So, after the slugs and snails devoured my first lot of tomato and egg plant seedlings, I am ready to give it another go. Today i bought seedlings in 4 different varieties of tomatoes, and some Long Purple eggplant seedlings, as well as some seed raising mix and some complete fertiliser for fruiting plants. today was dreadfully windy, and my seedlings got wind burned really badly, and we are supposed to have a cold few days, so i am leaving off planting for a few more days, but soon, my garden will be full of plants and i will have seed trays full of heirloom variety eggplants coming up :) So here are some photos (not mine) of what i will be growing this year.

Grosse Lisse


Father Tom


Reggae Roma

Black Russian

Cherry


Listada De Gandia Eggplant

Casper Eggplant


Long Purple Eggplant


Lebanese Zucchini


Golden Zucchini


DesrieePotatoes


Butternut Pumpkin


Japanese Pumpkin


Snow Peas

there are a few things still left over from last year too, like the loganberries , boysenberries and raspberries, which are flowering like crazy, also some broad beans that re-seeded themselves, some rocket, and my herb garden. all in all, it is going to be a very full veggie patch this year, provided the snails keep out of it :)








Blargh!

I had my first exam of the HSC on Friday. it went ok, but I am SICK AGAIN!. It's not fair. I always get sick, right when i have something important to do. My dad said to me that it is psychosomatic, in that as soon as I have to do something I don't want to, my body instantly seeks out and contracts the first disease it can lay its tendrils on. i hope not, otherwise i am due to be sick a lot in the future.

Feeling lonely and a bit put out.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Art Therapy


So i have been trying to draw more lately because it makes me feel better. Soon the heart of Art Course will start and I am really looking forward to that, and it has motivated me to do a bit of independent drawing. I think that this course is going to be really good for me.



North Roe Shawl of Elven Kind

The other day, I finished knitting a North Roe Shawl for my Niece's Christmas Present.



As soon as I had finished it, my daughter proclaimed that she wanted it. Instead of surrendering the shawl to her, I told her I would make her one, and that she could choose the yarn. As it happens, she chose some very lovely Spanish angora, merino, nylon 4 ply. So, I set her up in the kitchen to dye it.

She had a blast mixing all the different greens together. She would dip the brush into all of the pots, one after the other and say "See, look at the green I made, I bet you don't know how I made that lovely green" :) so, she spotted, and painted and striped and dripped for about an hour on this yarn, and at the end, this is what she got :-


I must confess, she is better than me. :) I am so proud of how good she is getting. If she keeps it up I will have to start selling her stuff and putting the money away in her account. I think she could make a fortune !
So the yarn Is now being turned into a North Roe Shawl, which my Husband has dubbed the "Cloak of Elven Kind".


I think it will be very nice.

Snickerdoodles!

I have been having a bit of fun with some cooking :) My friend Rae used to make this kind of biscuit called a snikerdoodle, and I thought I would try my hand at making them. I have managed, once again to surprise myself with my ability to cook biscuits - a skill I thought I didn't possess. However, as a successful attempt at making gingerbread men and now snikerdoodles proves, I am in fact capable of cooking biscuits without them becoming little charred lumps.



Snickerdoodles

Ingredients

1 & 3/4 cups plain flour
1/2 cup margarine
1 cup castor sugar
1 tsp vanilla essence
1 egg
1/4 tsp bicarb soda
1/3 tsp cream of tartar
1/4 cup raw sugar
1 tbsp ground cinnamon

Method

1.Preheat oven to 190°C (375°F)
2. With an electric mixer, beat margarine at a low speed until it goes lighter in colour( about 15-
20 seconds) and add castor sugar and beat for one minute.

3. Add vanilla and egg, and beat for a further minute.

4. Add bicarb and cream of tartar, followed by flour. Mix with a wooden spoon.

5. mix raw sugar and cinnamon together in a small bowl. Roll biscuit dough into 2 cm balls and roll them in the sugar until covered. Place on greased, lined trays, about 3-4 cm apart to allow for some spreading.

6.Cook in oven for 10 minutes. allow to cool on tray for a few minutes, before transferring to a plate or wire rack.



Makes a butt load.


Trads and Cheese

So, just a bit of a catch up, I now have my new spinning wheel, although i am yet to pay for it :/ Becky sent this wonderful Ashford Traditional into town with Em yesterday and Em dropped it off today, but once again, as is always my luck, I was out when she came by. I am sure I will see Becky soon. If not, I will post her the money. I also got some cheese roving, which I am guessing came from Tara. Thanks Tara!


Wednesday, October 6, 2010

ColourMart

I am IN LOVE with this web site, these wools, everything. The colours are all basic, which is good for me, who loves to dye, and it is SO affordable. Cashmere, merino, and Angora blend FOR SHIZ and I am speaking from experience. I bought some wools from them and it is AWESOME. These are remnants from designer knit wear producers. Spanish, and Italian spun wools. CHECKIT!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Sleeping Beauty Serena.

I got the opportunity to play around with a sleeping beauty Serena spinning wheel today. It belongs to my friend Ellie who was going to give it to me in exchange for sufficient yarny products. I was really keen on it too, but after having played with the wheel for an hour or so, I found it to have one too many flaws for me. :/ it is pretty disappointing, because it is truthfully a very pretty wheel.

Firstly, I gave the old girl a new tension spring, because every good wheel deserves one,and that fixed up the tension and she spins BEAUTIFULLY. I really cannot fault the wheels tension. The wheel also had a rickety pedal, which I fixed up with a screwdriver and some washers. It will still need a new hinge though, as the pin is loose and it still clacks a bit, but it doesn't move around as much now. The thing that finally did it for me, was the orifice. the orifice on the Serena is tiny. It is so hard to thread that it really gets quite frustrating. also, there are no maiden bearings on the Serena- after a bit of research, I have supposed this was a part of their way of making the Serena more affordable. In order to keep the wheel turning nicely, it needs to be oiled regularly, or it starts to make a loud "burpppp" sound - the result of friction I assume. This would be ok, except that the length of the orifice and the way it is positioned means that the grease gets into the orifice and onto my wool, staining it - which is NOT cool. :( So alas, I have decided to say no to Serena. I'm sorry sleeping beauty - your wheels are lovely, but the Serena is not for me.

I will still borrow it though :) because it is always fun to play with new wheels and Peggy broke again :(

Glitter in your Gruel.

So I am awake now.... and what should I do today?

Peggy is broken again.....ISO cheap working wheel to anyone who cares. Will consider any offer :P

I really don't know what to write about...blog for blog's sake....


maybe the day will bring more interesting things in it's wake.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Task 11.

Task 11 on my To Do list is done :) I have drawn/painted a picture, and I feel GOOD:) I may have some lunch now.




Green and other things.

I dyed some wool the other day, and I must confess, it is my favourite of all of the wools I have at the moment.








To do:

I am feeling pretty good today. I was on the Ravelry group "Over The Fence early this morning and came across a thread labled "I will clean all the things!" - which for those of you that are unaware, is a reference to the very humorous post on "Hyperbole and a Half - This is Why I'll Never be an Adult"

The focus of the thread was to create a To Do list and then publicly mark off when you have achieved each thing.

I like this idea. So, I put up my to do list, and have been working through it over the course of the morning.


So far, at 12 midday, my list is as follows.

  1. Shower -DONE
  2. Make Breakfast - DONE
  3. Clean Kitchen - DONE
  4. Make Caramel Slice - Pending
  5. Vacuum House- DONE
  6. Clean the Shower - DONE
  7. Wash, Dry and Fold at least one load of washing - DONE
  8. Tidy my desk - DONE
  9. Make Lunch - pending
  10. Colour in with Jordis - DONE
  11. Draw at least ONE picture - pending
  12. Cuddle Ryan - DONE
  13. Water The Plants - DONE [by the rain ;)]
  14. Feed Cats - DONE
  15. Make Dinner - pending
  16. Read to Jordis - DONE [will read some more at bed time too]
  17. STUDY - pending

So I'm not doing to bad. I am looking forward to the prospect of doing some drawing this afternoon, and the house is clean[ish]. It feels strange, that I have, for the first time in ages, separated my day up into a series of tasks. If I finish everything early does that mean I get to knit?

Thursday, September 30, 2010

The Heart of Art.

So here I am, once again, having neglected my blog for some time. I am close to the HSC now. Just a few weeks away. I am afraid. But in the end, what will be will be. I console myself with the idea that the universe always balances itself out.

I am glad just to be finished classes. This year has been desperately hard for me. Partly because of things out of my control and partly because of myself.

I have suffered from chronic depression since about 8 months after my daughter was born and it has been a very difficult journey for me these last few years, dealing with all of the challenges that I have posed for myself. Gladly, In the coming month, I will finally see an end to the ordeal that has been my HSC and will be able to begin the healing process. I have joined an online art class which I hope will get the ball rolling. amusingly enough, it starts at the same time as the HSC.

the course is a free course called The Heart of Art. for more information, find the button below. My friend Courtney put me onto it and I am grateful.

willowing.ning.com

I have been busily sourcing all the materials I will need for the course and i am shocked by how expensive it all is. It is lucky the course itself is free because the materials sure aren't. Water colour crayons, i found are about $40 for a set of 10 for the good ones. As it is, i had to make a compromise on quality, and get Crayola ones. I am hoping it doesn't make too much of a difference. My sister was sceptical of why i felt the need to get good quality ones, as she was under the impression that i was only going to use them once. It got me thinking...Will I actually apply what I learn from this course after it is over? I hope so. I hope I find a new way to express myself through this course.

I am surprised at how hard it was to find a brayer.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

BOW is IN!

I finally finished my HSC Art Body of work. I now have an elbow injury. Who would have known that the muscles that control your hands are in your elbow! Anyway, i am tired, as I haven't slept more than 6 hours all weekend, so here are the works I submitted. I am pretty sure if you click on them, you can look at them bigger. Sorry the pics aren't the best. As I said, i am injured and didn't have a tripod.